Pickaninny!?

[shantarapugh]

Well... I was at a family get together tonight and I was around a lot of my family members. Now I did my hair in some finger coils and just put a cute scarf on. My grandmother, aunty, and father whom I love to death said I looked like a PICKANINNY!! My aunt told me she's used to seeing darker skinned women with their hair like that and she thinks they look ok like that. But lighter skinned women (which I am) she thinks look weird wearing their hair like that. My dad kept telling me I looked like Miss Celie (Color Purple). Then my aunt went on to say how she just doesn't understand why some people (like me) would want to wear their hair like this when we have tried for over 200 years to get away from that whole thing about our "nappy" hair. I just told them this was me and this was who I am. And this is the hair that God has blessed me with. And if she knew what kind of chemicals were in those r.elaxers, she would think about putting that crap in her head anymore.
I just wanted to share with you all another negative experience I had with my family! <_<

[Hadasah]

we have tried for over 200 years to get away from that whole thing about our "nappy" hair[/b]
<_< :rolleyes:

[faithworks]

I&#39;m glad you set them straight...pickaninny?! :doh: They went real old school on you! :icon_headshake: Don&#39;t pay them any attention!

[simplyshida]

its unfortunate that they still have that "house ni**er-field ni**er" mentality

[monappy28]

I&#39;m sorry this happened to you :( Family can be our worst critics sometimes and if they only knew how they sounded, they would shut up!! Some people are so stuck in their mind sets that they don&#39;t even realize how ignorant they sound.....Pickaninny :rolleyes: geesh, give me a break :doh

[mimi]

My aunt told me she&#39;s used to seeing darker skinned women with their hair like that and she thinks they look ok like that. But lighter skinned women (which I am) she thinks look weird wearing their hair like that.[/b]
:huh: I&#39;m light skin with type 4 hair and i heard this before but i also heard it the other way like" oh you can be natural because you light skin" ;) No heffa i jus choose to wear my hair the way God intended it to be worn. it just irks me beacuse my mother is dark skin and it kind of gives me the impresion that somehow nappy hair is a genetic diease and only a selected few can rock the genetic sickness while the rest have to be " cured" <_<



Then my aunt went on to say how she just doesn&#39;t understand why some people (like me) would want to wear their hair like this when we have tried for over 200 years to get away from that whole thing about our "nappy" hair.
[/b]
No this i don&#39;t get. I wonder if some black epople realise that when they say things like this they are insulting themselves or implying that something on them was a mistake.

[~GAN~]

<span style="font-family:arial">It never ceases to amazes me how the friends and worse yet, the close family members will be the ones with the most ignorant things to say. <_< I&#39;m glad you let them know what&#39;s up though. ^_^ </span>

[boomslang]

I am so over stupid people like that. I don&#39;t even dignify them with a response. Of course they have better sense than to even try to bring that filth to me.

[catrina2223]

:huh: :blink:
Wow, thats messed up.

[afro_puff_sista2]

when people give those type of negative comments i just ignore it. people need to wake up and realize that their hair is beautiful napps and all!



when people give those type of negative comments i just ignore it. people need to wake up and realize that their hair is beautiful napps and all!
[/b]

p.s. what is a pickaninny?? (sorry im a 1995 baby i dont know all the old school terms) :pop: :unsure:

[red_980]

Girlfriend don&#39;t worry about that ridiculous mess!

[tinykias]

I&#39;m so sorry that happened to you. :hug:

You know what really gets me though. Is when people say stuff like that and you tell them that&#39;s nothing more than self hate and they just don&#39;t see how. I completely understand that people want to do whatever they want to their hair and they have a right to. But when your choices are based on having "good hair" or "light skin" or don&#39;t want to look "too black." There is a deeper problem than they&#39;re willing to admit. I really don&#39;t understand it. I don&#39;t think they do either. I want to give people the benefit and really not think they are morons. But if you think you were born with "good hair" then when you got older it went "bad" then the only explanation for your decision is that you "hate" your biologically given African features.

Is it me or is it that simple?

---Rant Over---

-tinykias

[Denny]

The emancipation proclamation only freed our ancestors legally but not mentally....... :(

[LBellatrix]

p.s. what is a pickaninny?? (sorry im a 1995 baby i dont know all the old school terms) :pop: :unsure:
[/b]

I would try to find a more reliable source but I&#39;m scared to see what would pop up if I Googled the term so here&#39;s a pretty basic definition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pickaninny

Contrary to Evan Mecham&#39;s claim, I NEVER EVER heard blacks refer to their own children as pickaninnies.

The only time anyone ever used that term around me was when a (white female) co-worker commented on my hair in the presence of several co-workers. She&#39;d better hope she never sees me again. :icon_twak:

Re the OP: :icon_headshake:

[Denny]

This word sounds similar to the Jamaican word pickney (sp) used to describe children, thought it was one of the motherlands words from West Africa that survived the crossing? :unsure:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jamaican_Creole

[T.Renee]

I can&#39;t believe she said that whole tidbit about getting away from our napps....

GOOD GOD people are so lost sometimes....

[masoesa]

I am sorry to hear about your experience but I am glad you put them straight. Please send them an invite to my exhibit:

http://www.nappturality.com/forum/index.ph...=0#entry2106647 (http://www.nappturality.com/forum/index.php?act=ST&f=2&t=123490&st=0#entry2106647)

or
This photo exhibit is a must see for every nappy head who ever thought Black people had "bad" hair. Come see a world in which natural African hair is prevalent rather than an exception and experience the new meaning of “bad� hair. Before you take a peak let me warn you: these styles are BAD!

http://going-natural.com/index.php?option=...=934&Itemid=388 (http://going-natural.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=blogcategory&id=934&Itemid=388)

[afro_puff_sista2]

I would try to find a more reliable source but I&#39;m scared to see what would pop up if I Googled the term so here&#39;s a pretty basic definition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pickaninny

Contrary to Evan Mecham&#39;s claim, I NEVER EVER heard blacks refer to their own children as pickaninnies.

The only time anyone ever used that term around me was when a (white female) co-worker commented on my hair in the presence of several co-workers. She&#39;d better hope she never sees me again. :icon_twak:

Re the OP: :icon_headshake:
[/b]

i read the definition. who in their right mind would call somebody that?! :huh: :angry: all i can say is just wow. im shocked! :angry:

[bald-headed]

Then my aunt went on to say how she just doesn&#39;t understand why some people (like me) would want to wear their hair like this when we have tried for over 200 years to get away from that whole thing about our "nappy" hair.
[/b]

My response to her would have been, "my point exactly. For over 200 years we can&#39;t get away from it which is why I am embracing it now."

[Blossom34]

:angry: How could they say such hurtful things to you!!! I had to set my family straight on my choice to go natural. Keep your head up sis. Dont listen to them. If youre comfortable with being natural then forget what everyone else says!!! :wub:

[swashington]

Wow! Its so unfortunate that we have to endure such ridicule from our family! No wonder other folk talk ish about us!!!!!!!!!!!! :blush:

[finey]

my family and friends told me i should straighten the ish outta my hair with a burning chemical i did so and now i regret it. mom was like child put a kiddie perm on it i was like no mom i dont want to straighten the ish outta my hair with a burning chemical anymore and she was like your hair would be more manageable and then i was like can you not see how the perm damaged my hair....DO YOU WANT ME TO GO BALD!!! her friend was like you have good wavy pretty hair because you mixed but my grandmother hair is better than yours..i was like wdf..what is up with this GOOD hair crap? that annoys me it feels so racist and then she had the audacity to tell me i should straighten the ish outta my hair with a burning chemical!!! :(

[meraki]

This word sounds similar to the Jamaican word pickney (sp) used to describe children, thought it was one of the motherlands words from West Africa that survived the crossing? :unsure:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jamaican_Creole
[/b]


I&#39;ve heard contradictory information about whether or not the term is W. African in origin, but I do believe that "pickney" and "pickaninny" are related.

As to whether or not blacks regularly used the term to refer to their own children, I don&#39;t know. But you can certainly still hear some people use the word "ninny" for breast.

[Chocolate CurlyGirl]

Wow that is terrible. They need a :icon_twak: My grandmother wasn&#39;t too happy about me decided to no longer get my hair str.aightened but she didn&#39;t dare say something like that. Just awful...

[chokolatedove]

wow. just tired.

[Afrodisiac_W]

its unfortunate that they still have that "house ni**er-field ni**er" mentality
[/b]


i concur.



we have tried for over 200 years to get away from that whole thing about our "nappy" hair. [/b]


i be john brown

[shantarapugh]

Yea! It was a real trip last night. I was like :o !!!!!!!!!! But I knew they would all have something to say once I became natural. I did a recent post about my sister telling me my hair was just straight up UGLY. Last night she told me I was the only one walking around there looking a hot mess. A year ago all their words may have bother me and sent me straight back to the CFC jar. But once I conditioned my mind and found out the facts about that stuff... I&#39;m like, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words will never hurt me!" :P

[msamuels]

LOL! That&#39;s the common response. Our families need to remember that slavery tried to strip us of thinking that anything black is no good! From our hair to skin. I&#39;ve heard that statment time and time again. Yes mi dear!

[beautyspot]

Yea! It was a real trip last night. I was like :o !!!!!!!!!! But I knew they would all have something to say once I became natural. I did a recent post about my sister telling me my hair was just straight up UGLY. Last night she told me I was the only one walking around there looking a hot mess. A year ago all their words may have bother me and sent me straight back to the CFC jar. But once I conditioned my mind and found out the facts about that stuff... I&#39;m like, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words will never hurt me!" :P
[/b]


I&#39;m so glad that you aren&#39;t letting them get to you. Family can say the most hurtful things. Your hair is beautiful and it&#39;s growing out so nicely. You have the support of your hubby and kids and that&#39;s all that matters. Tell the rest of them to kick rocks!

[Denny]

I&#39;ve heard contradictory information about whether or not the term is W. African in origin, but I do believe that "pickney" and "pickaninny" are related.

As to whether or not blacks regularly used the term to refer to their own children, I don&#39;t know. But you can certainly still hear some people use the word "ninny" for breast.
[/b]


The West African theory was told to me years ago by my West African english lit teacher, he also mentioned the word &#39;unno&#39; as well is similar to nigerian word - &#39;una&#39; (sp) refers to &#39;you&#39;

[bajanempress]

The West African theory was told to me years ago by my West African english lit teacher, he also mentioned the word &#39;unno&#39; as well is similar to nigerian word - &#39;una&#39; (sp) refers to &#39;you&#39;
[/b]

Yeah we have a similar word wunna- it means the same thing but I think unno/wunna is more like the southern ya&#39;ll than "you" in meaning.

We don&#39;t use pickney but when I lived in Jamaica, many people used it to refer to children, it is not derogatory in meaning when they use it.

[Surinam]

In Surinam we use the same word, meaning child or little...Pikin, Pitjin...

[beautifulleo]

Wow, how mean. I wonder if they know how hurtful statements like that can be.

[bhop13]

They ought to be so ashamed of saying some crap like that to you.

[prncsstaylor]

LMAO @



:huh: I&#39;m light skin with type 4 hair and i heard this before but i also heard it the other way like" oh you can be natural because you light skin" ;) No heffa i jus choose to wear my hair the way God intended it to be worn. it just irks me beacuse my mother is dark skin and it kind of gives me the impresion that somehow nappy hair is a genetic diease and only a selected few can rock the genetic sickness while the rest have to be " cured" <_<
No this i don&#39;t get. I wonder if some black epople realise that when they say things like this they are insulting themselves or implying that something on them was a mistake.
[/b]

I read the definition and was like :huh: .......but the picture they had on there really made me :angry:

[lea23]

I am sorry you had to hear from that especially from your family. I usually hear stuff like that from ignorant AA from work but I just ignore them.

stay strong lady your hair looks pretty to me :)

[Wonderfully Made!]

Dag, Sis! Your people went hard on you. I&#39;m sorry you had to go through that. :(

You handled the situation quite well, though. I&#39;ve said the same thing to people about being created this way. I say that er&#39;thing He made is good, so if you have a problem with it, take it up with Him! Then they hit me with the stuck face ( :huh: ) and I walk away with my head high. :D

[meraki]

The West African theory was told to me years ago by my West African english lit teacher, he also mentioned the word &#39;unno&#39; as well is similar to nigerian word - &#39;una&#39; (sp) refers to &#39;you&#39;
[/b]


Oh, I&#39;ve read it as well. It&#39;s just that I&#39;ve heard of another theory, too. For example, the Portuguese were big time slavers, and their word for "small" is pequeno. It&#39;s easy to see how that could morph into "pickney" and "pickaninny," especially if there was a word in a West or Central African language that was similar (like whatever word morphed into &#39;ninny,&#39; for &#39;breast.&#39;)

[CERINA]

your peeps are tripping! U hang in there chica...sounds like everybody is trying to break you down and make you go back...you keep your head up...you look fab!!!!!

Just when I think I have it bad with that one annoying gf (whom I call a balding permie...(i still love her though..lol)) here you are with your whole fam trippin...sorry this happened to you...

[artistnexile]

How unfortunate. That would have been the beginning of a great debate and discussion about African Americans and self hatred that has been instilled in us as hair is a major issue. You really could have put them in their places with hard facts and a smile to supplement your stance that you were proud to rock your natural hair texture.

[PrincessDrRe]

its unfortunate that they still have that "house ni**er-field ni**er" mentality
[/b]


Wow! Its so unfortunate that we have to endure such ridicule from our family! No wonder other folk talk ish about us!!!!!!!!!!!! :blush:
[/b]
I agree with both.

Let it go. As your hair grows and gets thicker and longer - comb it out in front of them. Talk about the "thickness" of your hair and how "lush" it feels.

That will shut it up post haste...

[shantarapugh]

The funny thing is... You would think your family would be your biggest supporter of some of the decision that you make. NOT!!! It&#39;s one thing though, I do have my husband who supports me all the way. He supported me when I was a p.ermie and supports me now. He was never comfortable with me wearing my hair re.laxed but... he supported me anyway. So, no, I&#39;m not worried about what these people (who call themselves my blood) say about me and my natural hair. But I do know I have one family that will never turn their backs on me with my decision to go natural... and that&#39;s my NAPPTURALITY FAMILY. I&#39;m so happy Dee created this site for people like me. THANKS DEE!!!!! :D

[bsquared86]

this reminds me of a vent i had (on another board) about my own grandmother making negative comments about my hair.

I was taking out my comb coils and she just started in on me about how bad my hair looked and all kinds of stuff. I didn&#39;t even try to defend my hair or anything, I just let her go with it and get it all off of her chest. Like she was laughing a bit but I didn&#39;t see anything funny. I think she was just trying to lash out at me because I had just disagreed with her about something TOTALLY UNRELATED TO HAIR, lol. I was shocked but I guess I should be happy that she&#39;s being honest. I just wish that people could see that you can be honest without being hurtful

If I didn&#39;t make sure that my confidence was teetering on the edge of conceit then I&#39;d be depressed right now (like I used to get when people I love would say disparaging things about me and my appearance). my feelings were hurt a little but i just chalked it up to her old age and her generation just not understanding things. she&#39;s always been very interested in what goes on with my hair b/c on her side of the family alot of the women suffer from female pattern baldness and here I came with a full head of healthy hair that grew without issue. i guess she saw it as my crowning jewel, you know? and now that it&#39;s not perfect in her eyes, she&#39;s disturbed. i love her so much and i know she loves me but i just wish she could UNDERSTAND. i dont want to have to answer questions about my hair eveytime i see her.

I wish that i didn&#39;t always have to explain myself to people. . . like i wish that i didn&#39;t always have to explain why i&#39;m not straightening my hair anymore or why i do this to my hair and why i do that. because the answer will always be "BECAUSE I WANT TO" . . . nothing more, nothing less. I wish I didn&#39;t have to always explain that, though my hair is nappy, it gets combed/styled/maintained REGULARLY-- i have not just decided to let my hair run rampant on my scalp, i do have some control and say in what happens up there, lol.

sorry for the long post, a sista is a bit long winded. . . it&#39;s the writer in me.

[mimi]

I wish that i didn&#39;t always have to explain myself to people. . . like i wish that i didn&#39;t always have to explain why i&#39;m not straightening my hair anymore or why i do this to my hair and why i do that. because the answer will always be "BECAUSE I WANT TO" . . . nothing more, nothing less. I wish I didn&#39;t have to always explain that, though my hair is nappy, it gets combed/styled/maintained REGULARLY-- i have not just decided to let my hair run rampant on my scalp, i do have some control and say in what happens up there, lol.
[/b]

when a person goes against somthing the is the "norm" there will always be questions. Many people don&#39;t understand or know the natural hair can be comb styled and maintianed. They always think of it as unkept

[prncsstaylor]

Why am I still :angry: about this?

[sunnysmile751]

Oh, I&#39;ve read it as well. It&#39;s just that I&#39;ve heard of another theory, too. For example, the Portuguese were big time slavers, and their word for "small" is pequeno. It&#39;s easy to see how that could morph into "pickney" and "pickaninny," especially if there was a word in a West or Central African language that was similar (like whatever word morphed into &#39;ninny,&#39; for &#39;breast.&#39;)
[/b]

I&#39;ve read that the word comes from Portuguese via the slave trade, from the word pequeninho meaning child or little one. Oxford English dictionary has this etymology :

" Portuguese pequeno is ult. of imitative origin; its closest cognate is Spanish pequeño in the same sense (1129 or earlier as {dag}pequenno), for which see further J. Corominas Diccionario crÃÂÂ*tico etimológico castellano e hispánico (1981) s.v. Compare also the post-classical Latin and Romance words for ‘small’ (with different suffixation) listed at PETIT adj. and n. and PÉKIN n.
The word is evidently one of those diffused around the Atlantic coasts through the Portuguese-based pidgins associated with trade (and esp. the slave trade) in the 17th cent. A Spanish origin is much less likely; although the diminutive adjective in -ino does occur in Spanish (compare {dag}pequenino, {dag}pequennino (both 1200 or earlier), {dag}pequeñino (1549 or earlier)), such attestations are very rare in comparison to the usual diminutive pequeñito (1410 or earlier); the Cuban Spanish form attested in quot. 1849 is comparatively late, and may reflect borrowing from English. In support of the Portuguese pidgin origin there is the evidence of Sranan (see quot. 1796) and the occurrence of pickaninny in West African pidgins in the 19th cent. (current West African pidgins have the form pikin which probably originated in Surinam and spread from there to Jamaica, thence to Sierra Leone (Krio), and West Africa more generally: see M. Huber Ghanaian Pidgin Eng. (1999) 85, 103). The theory that the word originated as a compound equivalent to Spanish pequeño niño little child or Portuguese pequeno negro (compare Sranan pikien-ningre ‘negerkinderen, kreolen’ given by H. C. Focke, Neger-Engelsch Woordenboek (1855)) is unlikely. "

[meraki]

Wow - thanks for that entry, sunnysmile!

[sunnysmile751]

No problem, though I&#39;m interesting in the other possible origins too. :)

[Ms.P]

Some family members can be absolutely ridiculous. I am so glad that my family LOVES natural hair.

[luvbear]

That is too cruel. I dont care if its a family member or friend. You choose to be an individual and we grow as individuals. We make choices to make ourselves happy not to make others happy.
Be comfortable in your own skin and hair. Hold your head hi and walk with pride and faith. :wub:

[siani721]

I&#39;m really surprised the picaninny comment came from a family member. :(

We&#39;ve got to do better...