View Full Version : Felt Discouraged

03-02-2004, 02:06 AM
:smug :duck

After my oldest daughter turned 3 I said I would stop relaxing my hair and go natural. My husband was and is all for it, however, I am going through a lot of emotions. Maybe it's because I also just found out that I am having my 3rd child but anyway something needed to change. Now the problem that I face is that I am not very good with all of these natural styles in which I love and I don't want to wear head wraps all of the time. I need so help bad and I also want my daughers to know that they are beautiful just the way God made them without stripping their hair of it's natural beauty. Well, I cut a lot of my hair off and it has no style or anything I just started cutting after I washed it and now I don't know if I have to totally cut it off or I can start from here. It is much shorter in the back than on my sides and in the top so you can only imagine how this looks. Please help me I get so encouraged from reading this board but once the excitement is over I am still back at square one because I can't do my own head. I have started this race and ain't about to turn back now. I just need a bit more wisdom. Thanks also for the beautiful pics of my beautiful Sista's...In His Arms, Letha

03-02-2004, 03:22 AM
Thanks Carmennc,

I just took my braids out after costing me a leg and a finger (smile) after about two weeks. I was in so much pain and others told me that I should have taken a perkaset or something that would numb my head. Well, I finally took them out early and noticed that once I took them out that my hair especially around the front hairline came out or is now very thin around my sides. That is also why I was so discouraged. Once I took those braids out my hair started coming out in clumps and was very tangled so I had to quickly come up with another game plan. I will try the hats and I can do the bantu knots on my daughter's hair but have problems doing my own. I will have to become very creative. I know it can be done. Thanks again for the suggestions. Letha

03-02-2004, 04:39 AM
Be encourage. You have come to far to turn back now! Finish your BC put on a head band and do what you have to do. i know you are probably going through alot with you hormones and stuff right now but you can do this. I found it was harder to transition than it is to be natural. so grab your lip gloss, some earrings and a head band and as ini says... go be cute!

03-02-2004, 11:37 AM
You can always just cut off the relaxed ends (or let a barber do it) and wear a twa OR just let it grow out. As for those gorgeous styles...they take time. Also, you have daughter(s) and so, you can practice on them while your hair grows out some more. There are plenty of homemade conditioning recipes and hair butters that will leave your hair nice, conditioned and soft. Go ahead and begin enjoying your natural hair...the sooner, the better. Keep your head up and stay positive!

Wishing you the best!


03-02-2004, 12:34 PM
You ladies are just wonderful. I tell ya, I have am addicted to this site and my husband now is even anxious to read it. I am afraid to let him start he just may start beating me up here and I have a problem with that (smile) A wonderful man that fully supports me, my family have not commented much but I know how they feel since they all use relaxers. Thanks again for the wonderful support and it's really good to see that you all are really enjoying being natural and that excites me a lot. So I will probably do the BC and go on with my life. Love you guys and I can't thank you enough.

03-02-2004, 01:04 PM

Congratulations-a new baby is always something to smile about :) . As for your hair, why don't you wait until you're feeling a little better to make major changes? Perhaps take this time out to educate yourself on how to care and style natural hair-maybe find a stylist in your area that specializes in natural hair care. In addition to this site, roshini.net and motowngirl.com have excellent information and 1 of them explains step-by-step how to recreate some of those natural hair styles.
Don't stress over your hair-relaxed, natural,or otherwise.
Again, congrats on baby 3 :razz

03-02-2004, 04:11 PM
Hi, Letha.
Hang in there, Girl, and stay positive. You have the best support system: your Creator, your husband, your kids, and the site!

03-03-2004, 05:18 AM
Hi Letha, I want to encourage you to hang in there as well. Pregnancy can cause all kinds of emotions and I think we all agree that so can HAIR! LOL! The great news is that hair tends to grows very nicely during most pregnancies. If you have all of the relaxer cut out now, you will probably have a rather large fro by the time your new baby arrives.

Just to share: I chopped all of my badly bleached hair off about a month before conceiving my daughter. I hated how it looked and threw a weave in for a month or so. Then I wore falls for a few more months. I didn't relax my hair at all during my pregnancy and by the time my daughter got here, I had a nice sized afro that I could actually style in a puff etc... Unfortunately, I wasn't trying to transition at this time and went back to relaxers. :doh STUPID, STUPID, STUPID!!! Now almost 3 years later, I'm kicking myself in the butt about it. I'm starting from scratch because I didn't have the foresight to take advantage of where you are now. GO FOR IT GIRL! If length is your major worry, remember, you've got the aid of those super boosting baby hormones to help it grow back! LOL!!!


03-03-2004, 06:54 AM
Congratulations ! ! ! The gift of bringing forth life is a blessing ! ! ! As for your hair, it seems you have a good situation to cultivate it ( the support of your spouse and the members of this board !! ). So, let it grow :rainfro . Best wishes.

03-03-2004, 04:57 PM
You can do it it just takes a little timae and paitence. We all have faith in you just continue to research styles that you like. Remember practice make perfect. Even so a nice scarf tied around the hairline and some earrings always does the trick. Good luck and God bless!