What goes through your mind when your the only natural around

**alicia2364** · 06-21-2011, 09:02 AM

I went to a b-b-q in a big park over the weekend and as I looked around I realized that I was the only natural there. I could not really explain my feelings at that moment but when I got home it realized it did bother me a little. I felt self-pride in myself for being natural, I felt sad for all those still in the matrix and I even felt angry that people would chose matted wigs and tangled overdue weaves over their own hair and I also felt depressed for us as a people thinking we will never undo the brainwashing that has been done to us on a large scale. I wish I was at a point where I could only be concerned with me, but I have only been natural for 13 months so still pretty new out the matrix. When I saw all those young girls with their broken off edges and in desperate need of a cut of all those split ends all in the name of creamy crack it still hurts my heart. You dont know what you dont know and so many still just dont know and it makes me sad. Has this ever happened to you?

**JayEnn** · 06-21-2011, 10:42 AM

This is so interesting as I often feel that way just being amongst my family.

One thing I will say is be proud of you and your choices. Just think of all those ladies/men there that have found inspiration in your presence; who have been battling with the decision to go natural and made that decision after seeing YOU on your own, in the crowd. It does nothing but show your strength. You are displaying a positive and power message as well as rocking an individual and gorgeous style!!!

Sometimes being a pioneer is tough but next year I bet you will not be the only one natural!!!!!!

**Bklyn78** · 06-21-2011, 11:39 AM

its such a part of me now that I don't even think about it unless its brought it. I am happy that my hair choice is a conversation piece and a time to educate the masses on hair ignorance. However, I am fine with it. I know i don't have to worry about it being too humid or dry or even a sprinkle of rain. I'm good all the way around.

**bhop13** · 06-21-2011, 11:40 AM

I went on a trip when I was less than a year in and I was the only person with natural hair and I was wearing curly box braids. I remember being at the party on the second night and when I looked around I realized (for the first time) that they all looked exactly the same. And that I used to look just like them, LOL. I thought "I'm so glad I'm natural."

Now if I do take notice these are the sort of things I find myself thinking:
*being thankful that I never got into weave
*I friggin love my hair and I'm glad I never feel like I have to hide it.
*I feel bad for people with no edges
*I don't miss perms and paying for them at all
*I find myself thinking "man...there is totally a better way"

**Princess Pamplemousse** · 06-23-2011, 09:51 AM

Originally Posted by bhop13

I went on a trip when I was less than a year in and I was the only person with natural hair and I was wearing curly box braids. I remember being at the party on the second night and when I looked around I realized (for the first time) that they all looked exactly the same. And that I used to look just like them, LOL. I thought "I'm so glad I'm natural."

Yep. Lately, straight hair has seemed so generic and...well, boring to me. So I notice (because I have eyes and use them) and then feel super fly because I know I stand out.

And if I see some ate up edges topped with a tight asz weave or a perm, I notice extra hard

I wonder why anyone would make the CHOICE to jack their hair up when so many others would kill for a head of hair. If wondering offends a person...they shouldn't be doing anything that makes them noticeable. Unfortunately a sheisty perm is extremely noticeable. Go natural and stand out for a reason to be proud of

Or get a good straight wig so you blend in with the others.

**MissQueenie** · 06-21-2011, 12:15 PM

I feel good about myself because even if no one else cares for their hair, I do. At my job I am the only natural, the only big afro in the crowd, the rest are white straight hair'd folk or flat ironed blowed out spanish folk. Really I don't care what the rest of them do with their hair.

**Batyah** · 06-21-2011, 12:30 PM

When I'm the only natural around and all others are permed or weaved up, I don't feel bad. I'm confident in who I am and where I am at this point. I LOVE my hair. I think it's beautiful just the way it is and I carry myself as such. I normally don't look down on those women who choose to wear weaves or have perms. The only time I give them the *side eye* is when their hair looks a mess as though they have NOT groomed it or they just don't care about their hair.

Originally Posted by bhop13

Now if I do take notice these are the sort of things I find myself thinking:
*being thankful that I never got into weave
*I friggin love my hair and I'm glad I never feel like I have to hide it.
*I feel bad for people with no edges
*I don't miss perms and paying for them at all
*I find myself thinking "man...there is totally a better way"

You're better than me bhop! I don't feel bad for them especially when the cause of their receeding edges is from constantly wearing tight braids, back to back. I have a co-worker like that. It does not look good at all. I really wish she would stop wearing those tight cornrow extensions and try to nurture her severly receeding hair line back to health. I don't say anything to her simply because she's an older woman and pretty much set in her ways...*shrugs*

**Mz Bajan** · 06-21-2011, 12:34 PM

Hmmm... I don't really feel anything, I don't actually think about it. Most of the time I don't even notice that im the only natural in a crowd.
But I do think about it when im NOT the only natural in one area. Being the only one doesn't faze me but seeing others makes me happy =]

**swingbolder** · 06-21-2011, 12:56 PM

Yeah, I mostly just feel bad about the existence of the black hair matrix in general, when I'm in situations like that.

**phillygirl** · 06-21-2011, 01:05 PM

What goes through my mind? That I'm the flyest chick up in this piece!

But, seriously, I don't usually notice. I'm the only natural in my family - both my side and my husband's side (except my daughter), so I'm used to being the only one. Like someone else mentioned, I'm more likely to notice another natural than the lack of any.