So this little girl asked me if I was a boy or a girl....

**theheiressof** · 09-30-2011, 02:43 PM

Yeah. I know right. I was at work on Tuesday during one of our "Kids Eat Free" nights. This little BLACK girl came up to me and asked me if I was a boy or a girl. Right in front of this really cute guy who I had been eyeing all night. I dont think I look like a boy...i mean I had on makeup and earrings, and my hair decided it wanted to do the curly thing all over that day, instead of just in the front and top of my head. I was kind of feeling myself. The thing about it is, I would expect this from a little white girl, because let's be real, adult white women don't understand the concept of afro-american hair, so you KNOW their kids are going to be equally confused. But this little girl was black, and like...8 or 9 years old. And she looked like she had 4b/4c hair because she was rocking cornrows braided up into a puff. So that really confused me. And on top of all that, her mom had short hair. Starter dreads that hadnt even begun to lock, so idk why she didnt understand. It was a definite confidence deflater. Blahh. I told my boyfriend and he laughed at me, which didn't help. But I just can't wait till my hair is long enough to do a puff so there is absolutely NO question about my gender. Anyone else have this problem?

**MzBrown5512** · 09-30-2011, 03:44 PM

Girl, rock your hair and it's a very pretty picture of you in your profile pic. Just remember your earrings and those things to accent your are a female. Rock on...

**starlightbeauty** · 09-30-2011, 04:13 PM

I think that kid was just being an a-hole. I mean, you had on earings, makeup, etc. She knows she's seen women with short hair before. You look very lovely in your picture. Pay it no mind.

An older white guy once tried to make a joke out of pretending to mistake me for a guy. People can be such donkeys. Don't let it affect your confidence because you are beautiful!

**Fuzziwuz** · 09-30-2011, 06:48 PM

I've mistakenly confused genders and a guy bumped into me once and said sorry dude

. Honestly, I can't tell nowadays. But the difference, you're showing other signs of femininity than short hair. IA with Starlight... the kid was being an @ss. Don't allow the smart @ss to dampen your spirit.

I really loathe kids that bud into grown folks bizness and the parents nearby that don't reprimand. Their not your equal, friends... homies, mind ya bizness.

**MissQueenie** · 09-30-2011, 08:27 PM

I once said 'Oh I'm sorry ma'am!' thinking I bumped into an old white women. It was actually a much younger white guy, with an old bag face!

Pay no mind to children. They don't even know not to play in traffic so what does that tell you about kids?

**KellyVonn** · 09-30-2011, 08:50 PM

Awww..lil sis. Don't pay kids no mind, the child probably really didn't know, you know how some people are dressing these days. You look adorable.

**Bejewelle** · 09-30-2011, 11:43 PM

Yah, that was a very rude child, either very rude or incredibly stupid [would have been brilliant if you had asked her which]. Don't let it weigh on you, she's not worth it.

**AuNaturale4** · 10-01-2011, 03:07 PM

All i have to say about this is....BIG EARRINGS ND MAKE SURE URE LIP GLOSS IS POPPIN!! that is the hardest part for me! i dont want someone thinking im a guy when i have on sweats nd they say sir nd i turn around all shocked!!

**coalblacklocs** · 10-01-2011, 04:05 PM

Yeah, some kids go through a phase where they are learning that long hair does not = girl and short hair does not = boy. It throws them for a loop sometimes.

don't turn turn that as an insult to yourself. It really doesn't have nothing to do with you, just probably her noticing that your hair is short.

Her mom may have been new to going natural, and it may have been something she is learning to wrap her mind around right now. Her mom has short natural hair, and you have short natural hair. Yet both of you are girls. And it's ok, and pretty. If her mom is newly natural, it may be a big thing to the little girl right now. Her world and perceptions of what males and females are "suppose to look like" have been thrown upside down, and now she is questioning every short natural head she sees, because now she realizes that they might not all be guys. some of them are girls. You are helping change her perception of femininity and beauty.

It's not like she said you were ugly or nothing. Unless she had an attitude or something, I just don't see it as a negative. and kids that age don't always realize that certain questions are rude, or mean it in a rude way. Sometimes, if we already have deep seated misgivings about our hair deep down inside, and somebody says something neutral to us, we begin to assign all those negative assumptions that we feel they meant when really what they said was neutral.

Chalk this up as something that you help consolidate in that little girl's mind today (namely, that short natural hair can be feminine and beautiful) and keep it popping.

**xrecreatex** · 10-01-2011, 10:57 PM

Wow, I find that kinda strange...I mean I would expect that from like a 5 year old or something. An 8 or 9 year old should be able to differentiate genders. I wouldn't worry about it though. My hair is short too. Short hair can make you look really feminine because it really brings out your facial features. I'm sure it looks great on you.