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  1. #1
    Suzi_Q's Avatar
    Suzi_Q is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    Default So I'm Wrong For Saying My Daughter Has Beautiful Hair? Ehh?

    Today I posted a picture of my daughters hair on Instagram, it was sort of a length check. I really didn't state anything on the picture but just that "length check".

    A close friend of mines made a comment..

    "Gurl stop, don't instill a hair complex when she get's older"

    I was pretty lost at this comment.. So I responded to what hair complex is she talking about. My daughter knows she has long hair, it's on her head. She knows it's also thick and beautiful, if anything I've instill in my daughter is just that and there's nothing wrong with it.

    Then she get to preaching about how later down the line when she will want to experiment with her hair and if it falls out or have to cut it then what. As she stated "She will cry for her long thick hair"

    What?

    I'm lost.. For one my daughter is only 7. When she reach an age (1 that she will want to so call experiment, by that time she more than likely won't because it's about educating your child about their hair and how to love what came out their scalp. Something many of us did not get growing up. I don't have to worry about my daughter, she loves her hair.. big, curly and awesome and just like her moms.

    What really ticked me off is that she's also natural, so I would think she would understand where I'm coming from. But I guess not. It kind of ticked me off. So I stated that this is why there are females with effed up edges and some women who hides their kinky hair because they don't know what to do with it.

    It was a low blow because she's one of those people.

    Ugh, I never had a "let me explain this to you" moment before when it came to my or my daughter's hair til today. Even though I could have simply ignored it, due to her being a friend is why I had to say something.. Plus I go into defense mode when it comes to my child.

    Phew... I had to get that out.

  2. #2
    Suzi_Q's Avatar
    Suzi_Q is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    sucks I can't edit I mean to put the age of eighteen..

  3. #3
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    Well dang..what would your friend think about me and what I do with Cherish My Daughter?


    Truth be told, don't worry about her opinion. As far as I'm concerned, the only one walking around with the anointing to mother my girls--while I'm still willing and able-- is me. God gave me the job, I welcomed it. As much as my friends may care, I doubt they pray and fast and sweat for my girls as much as I do. They don't know them the way I do either. I can listen to another person's opinion and weigh it. If it's garbage it needs to go out like garbage.
    Last edited by NeverGiveup; 05-20-2012 at 09:24 PM.
    Nappy hair isn't burdensome. Dispel the myths early--blogging nappy hair care for girls.
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    CherishMyDaughter on YouTube and Facebook



  4. #4
    Suzi_Q's Avatar
    Suzi_Q is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    Yea it was a serious WTF moment... I'm waiting for her rebuttal now. I can already see it being full of foolishness.

  5. #5
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    Question

    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi_Q View Post
    Today I posted a picture of my daughters hair on Instagram, it was sort of a length check. I really didn't state anything on the picture but just that "length check".

    A close friend of mines made a comment..

    "Gurl stop, don't instill a hair complex when she get's older"

    I was pretty lost at this comment.. So I responded to what hair complex is she talking about. My daughter knows she has long hair, it's on her head. She knows it's also thick and beautiful, if anything I've instill in my daughter is just that and there's nothing wrong with it.

    Then she get to preaching about how later down the line when she will want to experiment with her hair and if it falls out or have to cut it then what. As she stated "She will cry for her long thick hair"

    What?

    I'm lost.. For one my daughter is only 7. When she reach an age (1 that she will want to so call experiment, by that time she more than likely won't because it's about educating your child about their hair and how to love what came out their scalp. Something many of us did not get growing up. I don't have to worry about my daughter, she loves her hair.. big, curly and awesome and just like her moms.

    What really ticked me off is that she's also natural, so I would think she would understand where I'm coming from. But I guess not. It kind of ticked me off. So I stated that this is why there are females with effed up edges and some women who hides their kinky hair because they don't know what to do with it.

    It was a low blow because she's one of those people.

    Ugh, I never had a "let me explain this to you" moment before when it came to my or my daughter's hair til today. Even though I could have simply ignored it, due to her being a friend is why I had to say something.. Plus I go into defense mode when it comes to my child.

    Phew... I had to get that out.
    Suzi Q, I'm wondering if your friend's comment could have something to do with your use of the words 'long and beautiful'? As if to say that your child's hair is beautiful because it is long. Maybe that's the point of view your friend was coming from?

  6. #6
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    I kinda agree with your friend. Length is still a HUGE hangup for most Black women.
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. -Eleanor Roosevelt

  7. #7
    Suzi_Q's Avatar
    Suzi_Q is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    I can understand if it was a issue with length, something I don't obsess over with her hair. But I didn't add the long and beautiful part til after she said something. Maybe I could have left the long part out. But to go off on me because I posted a pic and said "length check" was kind of crazy. Should I have explained that I just took her hair out from being twisted up for a while and wanted to see how much it grew? But then that would be me doing too much for her to understand what I meant. Especially for it to be on Instagram..

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    Then what's the purpose of a length check? I've never done a length check because I've just cared to have hair on my head. I don't take any value from it being 3 in. or 12 in.

    One thing that I agree with Jada Pinkett Smith on is that she is raising her daughter to not define any of her beauty by the length of her hair.
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. -Eleanor Roosevelt

  9. #9
    bhop13's Avatar
    bhop13 is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    It sounds like your friend is the one with the issue. If your daughter's hair is long then it is what it is. I don't see a problem with saying so. And you should be telling her that her hair is beautiful. Most of our hair problems come from being told negative things, not positive. She's probably someone that is unsatisfied with their hair so they can't deal with folks getting results that they are pleased with.

    Experimenting with hair is just something people do when they get bored or want to try something new (unless it's to spite parents, lol). Going natural was an experiment for me. I liked my hair but I wanted to try something new.
    GOT PANK??
    Beauty is not defined by the masses, but by the opinion of the individual ~Rune Leknes
    http://public.fotki.com/bhop13/




  10. #10
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    bhop13 is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by chachadiva
    Then what's the purpose of a length check? I've never done a length check because I've just cared to have hair on my head. I don't take any value from it being 3 in. or 12 in.

    One thing that I agree with Jada Pinkett Smith on is that she is raising her daughter to not define any of her beauty by the length of her hair.
    Sometimes you just want to see. You may not take any value from it but there are many that do.
    GOT PANK??
    Beauty is not defined by the masses, but by the opinion of the individual ~Rune Leknes
    http://public.fotki.com/bhop13/




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