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  1. #1
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    Unhappy Starting Over and just need to vent

    Been completely natural for 2 years and 4mths. Although my hair was growing, I just did another chop because I had split ends or so I think, and I had horrible knots and was shedding. Im at my wits ends. I dont use heat. and I purchased a denman brush because I heard so much about them and wanted to try it, Before I was finger detangling. I dc and do a protein treatment once a month. I use shaemoisture and seal ends with OO or with another oil. Or I may use just water in a spray bottle and seal with an oil. I only co wash. and I wear a combo or twists and afro and I try to wear a satin scarf at night. No matter what I have done, still same results. I think I am a 4a,4b although I dont really know and dont think that it really matters. I just dont know what else to do. Thanks for listening.

  2. #2
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    Try sta sof fro. That product worked wonders for me when my hair was loose and I had a lot of retention.

  3. #3
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    Thank you puff. I will try it.

  4. #4
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    Sorry that you're feeling discouraged!! It took me 6+ years to get close to figuring out what my hair needs and doesn't need - and I still don't always get it right. Let me respond to a few things that you mentioned:

    *Hair sheds an average of 50 - 150 strands per day. Depending on how dense your hair is, significant shedding may just be a part of your natural shedding process.
    *Knots are very, very common to our hair. I have them ALL.THE.TIME. Keeping my hair stretched (I never let my hair shrink all the way up anymore) and well moisturized & sealed helps a lot with unraveling some of the knots, but there is never a day when I don't find several. Depending on how many strands are involved in the knots, and how much time/patience I have, I either use oil to gently unravel them, cut them out, yank them out (I DON'T recommend that!!), or sometimes I just ignore them.
    *Regular protein treatments - everyone doesn't need them. For some nappturals, too much protein can cause brittle and breaking hair. I would cut back on the protein and see how your hair responds. I never do protein treatments anymore and my hair is healthier without them.
    *Co-washing only - you MIGHT be dealing with product build up. Some products - even some healthy or natural products - need a gentle shampoo to fully remove them, so that moisture can get to the hair. This is especially the case if you're applying more than one layer of thick or heavy oils/creams between washes. If there is product build up, then the water you're spritzing with is not getting to your hair because the build-up of conditioner, oils & other products is sealing the water out. I'd try using a gentle, sulfate-free shampoo and see if your hair responds better to your moisturizing and sealing.

    And you didn't mention this, but if you're not drinking a healthy amount of water, that can also cause your hair to be dry, and unhealthy.

    Don't be too discouraged - most of us have periods like what you're experiencing. It just might be a matter of you needing to continue to experiment until you find the right balance with your products and techniques.

  5. #5
    Join Date
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    ^^^Great advice. Hang in there...keep making note of your mistakes. One thing you can definitely do is not repeat them. Tell yourself lesson learned.
    Nappy hair isn't burdensome. Dispel the myths early--blogging nappy hair care for girls.
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  6. #6
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    I understand. I had this issue for a very long time until I tried the L.O.C method Liquid, Oil, Cream.
    Liquid: Water
    Oil: I use either coconut-for protein, or EVOO-moisture
    Cream: I use the Kimmaytube leave in modified-KCKnot Today and Aloe Vera juice
    This keeps my hair moisturized for the whole week. I also still have ssk's but I treat mine the same way CCmomof5 does lol. However I have noticed less ssk's and splits.

  7. #7
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    i understand. what seems to work for me is when i use something heavy like qhem's heavy cream on my ends 3-4 times per week. when i do that i get far less tangles and knots.

  8. #8
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    Sometimes the elementary basics are often overlooked, yet make all the difference in the world, so I'll mention my two favorites. If you already have this covered, feel free to ignore.

    1) How is your water quality? Some people notice huge improvements if they use filted water, either by way of using a filtered shower head, or using jugs of distilled water to rinse their hair. It could make a big difference as to how your hair accepts product thereafter.

    2) My hair DESPISES protein. Both loose and locs. It makes it rough and hard and break easily. Have you ever experiemented with laying off the protein to see if it makes a difference? For me, the effects are immediate after I use a product with protein it it. How is your hair right after your protein treatment?

  9. #9
    krmlwd is offline Active Nappturality Member
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    I know exactly how you feel. How do you take care of your hair when in those styles? Are your hands always in your hair needlessly? I'm terrible with that which I knows contributes to SSKs. It sounds like you may just have a problem with knots and shedding but not keeping your hair moisturized, yea? If so maybe your hair is similar to mine in that SSKs are just an aspect of your hair and they're going to come out eventually when the strand sheds. All we can do is try to minimize the damage that they may cost. I noticed I retained length when I stopped cutting like crazy and just became more gentle (if thats even possible) with my hair. No more wide tooth combs or denmans with some teeth removed. Just my fingers gently stretching my ends and a spray bottle of just water, then I work from there. Maybe strengthening hair rinses (I use ACV, horsetail, nettle, etc. in my rinses) can help with any excessive shedding. Hope this helps. Oh, try oiling your hair at night with coconut oil then place a satin cap over it and your hair will be very soft and conditioned in the morning.

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