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  1. #1
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    Angry my low-porosity hair sucks~!!

    I tried EVERYTHING. My hair ALWAYS feels dry (hard when I use AVJ--even diluted)!! I used all sorts of products! Butters and oils are NOT working. The only reason my hair has been growing is because I keep it braids most of the time, but I stopped for a while now. Ready to have it in braids for another year again because I can't do anything real cute with it when it's free! I am so frustrated! It can never stay soft and moisturized for more than 2 hours, I swear. I want to use only 2-3 products if I can to keep my regimen simple and be able to detangle it easily in one piece. I don't want my hair longer than what Naptural85 has now (she is now wearing my goal length--maybe it is APL when stretched?). Been natural for almost 3 years. I am not asking for long, flowing, straight hair. I just want medium length moisturized beautiful kinky curls and it seems I will never get that I really wanna cry..

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    Did you clarify? You might be dealing with build up. My hair is low porosity and I find that I need a really good cleansing every now and then to avoid build-up that causes hardness. Bentonite clay is really good for deep cleansing if you don't want to use a sulphate shampoo.

    Something else that helps me is wrapping my hair in a t-shirt and allowing it start drying PRODUCT FREE for hours after a wash. Then when it's just damp, I add some moisturizing leave-in and seal. That really helps with softness. Between washes, I dampen with an AVJ mixture and seal with my oil/cream mixture. Works wonderfully until the products start building up - then it becomes hard and crunchy and I have to wash. And since you mentioned that AVJ doesn't help with softening your hair, maybe you can just dampen with water, or a light leave-in on a daily basis, and seal with whatever works for you.

    And by the way - if your strands are coarse like most of mine are, the level of softness that you really desire may be ever-evasive. You might need to re-evaluate what your hair feels like when it is thoroughly cleansed, moisturized & sealed, and use that as your reference point, instead of how soft it is. Hope that helps!
    Last edited by CCmomof5; 10-23-2012 at 09:09 PM. Reason: typos

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    Co-signing CCMom. I don't exactly know what porosity I have to be honest but I do know that if I apply products and my hair still feels dry underneath, it usually means it's time for a clarifying wash. And I couldn't agree more with making sure you aren't comparing apples to oranges regarding what softness is. Your hair's "soft" probably isn't anybody else's "soft."
    Hello, 2021. Glad to see you. Hope you're bringing us goodness and light this year!

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    Quote Originally Posted by CCmomof5 View Post
    Did you clarify? You might be dealing with build up. My hair is low porosity and I find that I need a really good cleansing every now and then to avoid build-up that causes hardness. Bentonite clay is really good for deep cleansing if you don't want to use a sulphate shampoo.

    Something else that helps me is wrapping my hair in a t-shirt and allowing it start drying PRODUCT FREE for hours after a wash. Then when it's just damp, I add some moisturizing leave-in and seal. That really helps with softness. Between washes, I dampen with an AVJ mixture and seal with my oil/cream mixture. Works wonderfully until the products start building up - then it becomes hard and crunchy and I have to wash. And since you mentioned that AVJ doesn't help with softening your hair, maybe you can just dampen with water, or a light leave-in on a daily basis, and seal with whatever works for you.

    And by the way - if your stands are coarse like most of mine are, the level of softness that you really desire may be ever-evasive. You might need to re-evaluate what your hair feels like when it is thoroughly cleansed, moisturized & sealed, and use that as your reference point, instead of how soft it is. Hope that helps!
    Quote Originally Posted by LBellatrix View Post
    Co-signing CCMom. I don't exactly know what porosity I have to be honest but I do know that if I apply products and my hair still feels dry underneath, it usually means it's time for a clarifying wash. And I couldn't agree more with making sure you aren't comparing apples to oranges regarding what softness is. Your hair's "soft" probably isn't anybody else's "soft."
    Cosign alla dis here. Low porosity folk stand up!!!!!

    ETA: I purchased a shower filter a year ago this December, and I've noted a tremendous change in how my hair feels after cleansing and my scalp is calmer. Also, my hair seems to love avj in spritzes and rinses. It's like the hair relaxes enough so that my moisturizers and sealer work better. YMMV.

    Last edited by OHR; 10-23-2012 at 11:18 PM.









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    Thanks.. but funny thing is I did clarify with Bentonite clay just a few days ago. I did it at night. When I dealt with hair the next night, it was hard and stiff. Very drying to my hair. I wanted to stop the commercial products and I wanted to try bentonite clay..and while washing I thought it was going good (mixed with water and AVJ)... but I found it didn't work for me. I can't seal with even Jojoba--it dries out my hair.. I use only water to moisturize. I tried just AVJ. I used both mixed with jojoba in a spritz. I have tried taking out the oil.

    I researched low porosity for a while now. Quite a few people with it cannot have protein, some can't have oils and butters (I heard AVJ was good to seal with...I tried it.. my hair was not soft or very manageable some time afterwards. It detangles well. But it's not working for me in the long haul. Maybe only in cleanses it's fine? I heard AVJ can be bad for some people with Lo-po hair. I am BAD with protein, oils AND butters (PLEASE BELIEVE ME--I did coconut, jamaican black castor, coconut, olive, jojoba..etc), and my curls are very tightly curly and very FINE (but I think my hair is dense). I have the most fragile hair and curls one could see. I think I am about 3c/4a/4b mix. My hair dries out QUICK. It gets puffy and I swear is SHRINKS NEAR 90% and tangles VERY easily, so battling breakage and trying to retain length is very hard. I try to keep braids, twists, or buns. I can never have it free--I will be asking for tangles, especially since it got longer. My hair does like warm water.. and many lo-po people feel that high Ph products work..but after bentonite and African black soap..it is false for me. AVJ feels nice at first but it goes bad for my hair in the summer and in the colder days like now (I live in MN--it's humid in the summer and gets very dry in the winter--AVJ didn't work in either season for me).

    I am ready to give up. I may just do the things my mom did to my hair to grow it healthy when I was a child (I had very long hair when she first relaxed me at age 10 even though it looked kind of short when I was natural). She never believed in oil and grease and gel and all of that junk a lot of mothers had with their little girls. I asked her again.. I swear she just used (usually) warm to hot water and got a brush... but she told me she really used mixed conditioner and warm water. THAT'S it. I want to go back to that. I am going to try it today. However, I am worry about build up. I don't mind clarifying with natural products once a week (I heard that fine hair should be washed once a week--can't handle build up for weeks like thick coarse hair) but I DON'T want to go back to that bentonite clay. I don't have to money to keep trying things online like rhassoul clay or that terressentials product. I am not going back to african black soap. I don't know what ph my hair likes. If it's lower, my hair just does what it wants. If it's higher, it dries up even more. With water, I just get a hell of a lot of shrinkage and it will dry up like a prune if I don't "seal". And I know my hair HATES oils. Don't even talk to me about butter. I wanna give up. I will never have the hair I want with such tight, dry curls that hates everything and is low porosity and is so fragile at the touch of a finger. I am doomed...

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    My hair was soft using certain commercial conditioners. That's the only moisture my hair loved best. But I want to find something natural preferably that can have the same effect. My hair rejects sealing.. and I never did that as a kid when I remember I was natural before the relaxed. It got wet then was braided up. My mom did the mixed warm water/conditioner concoction ever since. Gonna try it for a few days and see how that works. I hate that it will have to be a commercial product. Since I read AVJ is a natural conditioner.. I was hoping it would work with a little of it mixed with water. It doesn't. Sigh.

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    My hair is low-porosity, I think. It takes a long time for it to get wet when I wash it. As others have mentioned, clarifying has helped. I also had to lessen my use of acv which is acidic. It kept my cuticles closed and moisture had a hard time getting in. What helped me was to wash with a shampoo/baking soda. I use Aussie Moist to dc/baggy and that gives me a -huge- moisture boost.

    Just like you, I don't do well with protein or butters. I have to use water-based cremes and light oils.

    I once tried to go the all-natural products route, but two things: 1) it was hecka expensive 2) hard to find products that gave me the desired results.


    eta: Just thought of this: Does your area have hard water? That could be a factor
    Last edited by CoilyHairedBeauty; 10-23-2012 at 09:21 PM.
    "Authenticity is true beauty."
    "Asking God why He gave us this hair, then praying for it to grow..." Stahp it!
    /

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    So sorry for your frustration! But if you know something that works and its not harmful, go for it!! Why not follow your mom's regimen if it resulted in healthy hair? You can always choose a more natural conditioner. Sometimes it can be the tiniest tweak in products that make a difference - for me aloe vera gel is a no-go, but when I changed over to the juice, it made all the difference.

    One other thing - do you securely (not too tight, but not loose either) braid, plait, or twist your hair immediately after applying moisturizing products, and before it's dry? That helps my hair to retain the moisture much better than if it air dries in loose twists.

    HUGS to you!!

    ETA: Totally agree with CoilyHairedBeauty's suggestion to check for hard water. That can make a big difference. I bought a shower filter, and it helps a LOT!
    Last edited by CCmomof5; 10-23-2012 at 09:31 PM.

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  12. #10
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    Even though I don't have low porosity, I agree the ladies who suggested that you do what has worked for your hair before. Leaving in conditioner is something that the majority of super long-haired ladies do . If I do a wash n'go with only Aussie Moist, my hair stays moisturized longer than it will with any traditional leave-in. Currently, I'm PSing using Aussie as my leave-in because it's got staying power. I also agree with trying baking soda as your poo since it has a high ph and lifts the cuticle.

    Off topic: Naptural85's hair is about waist length stretched. I love where her hair falls, but I have to grow like twice the length because of my dang shrinkage .

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