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Thread: Hidden Naturals

  1. #41
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    You can change the "outside" all day, everyday...but true change comes when the MIND is changed. Sounds like your friend was freed physically but still lives her life mentally enslaved...and until she decides to change that predicament, there isn't much that you can do. Her change must come from within.
    "Think, Plan, Execute" ~ Jawar

  2. #42
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    I stopped re-laxing my hair in 2003, but I didn't start wearing napptural styles until 2006. For almost 3 years, I was wandering through the wilderness...press-ing my hair, wearing hairpieces, etc because I didn't know what to do with it. This meant that there was no big chop for me because I didn't know anything about transitioning. All I knew was that I did not want to put anymore chemicals in my head. I tried twisting my hair but it didn't look right because my ends were still re-laxed, so I just gelled my hair back into a ponytail. During the summer of 2006, I went to what I thought was a napptual hair salon because I finally decided to embrace my actual texture. Well, it turned out that although the salon specialized in natural hair, they did not style hair in napptural styles, they only press-ed hair. Although disappointed, I went ahead with the appointment and had my hair press-ed. It was not until August of 2006 that I started to actually use Nappturality(I had been a member since 2005) to figure out what to do with my hair. I put in my first set of twist in that August. They were scrawny and raggedy, but they were mine. I was so proud of myself. There has been no looking back since. ^_^

    9/06



    7/07



    :blush:

    You can't force someone to be where they don't want to or are not ready to be. If it is going to happen, it should come naturally. Just pray that your friend sees the same beauty in napptural hair that you see.

  3. #43
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    IMO as long as you're not rela.xing it you're natural. Everything else is fair game. I p.ress my hair on very low heat from time to time to stretch it. I hate shrinkage. I wear extension braids too because they give me time to worry about something other than what I'm going to do with my hair. I wear nappy weaves and clip ons in the winter to protect my hair and keep it moist. Everyone has the right to be ok with whatever their lifestyle is.
    Quit tripping on what you're wearing on your behind and get some education in your head.

  4. #44
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    One of my coworkers stopped straightening her hair with lye or no lye fire cream when she got pregnant and has never worn her natural hair out. She has worn her hair consistently in braids and twist extensions ever since. She's not the type to do hair styling and doesn't have much patience with doing her own hair.

    I once witnessed a woman get her own long natural hair blown out only to have a weave sewn over it. I figured either she wore weaves to keep from damaging her own hair or she worked someplace where she didn't feel comfortable wearing her hair natural.
    I just want you to recognize me in the temple, you can't hurt me I found peace within myself--Michael Jackson (RIP)

  5. #45
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    I also consider locs and twists and braids (on your own hair) natural hair styles. When I said "out" I didn't necessarily mean a fro. And as others said, I didn't mean covering for religious purposes here. I meant something that was just your own hair. Not fake hair and not hair that has had its texture altered by either heat or chemicals, cuz pressing your hair still makes it straight. My idea of what it is to be natural is a little more than just not putting chemicals on your head. I don't know, I think what I'm saying is pretty simple. :dunno: If you do wear your hair out (so not for those who cover their hair when out) but the only (again, I said before, I even get the desire to mix it up or just giving your hair a rest in braids or wigs or whatever) styles you show to the world involve fake hair or hair that has been straightened, I don't consider you natural. It's just really suspicious when someone says "I'm natural" and no one ever sees their nappy hair and they only show people straightened or fake hair. Of course not everyone has to agree with this. Like I said, my opinion.
    [/b]
    Okay, I understand. I thought before when you said “out” you meant like an Afro or something. I’m still trying to get used to the lingo here. Whenever I think of braids, I just assume the hair is being braided with the natural hair, not extensions, unless it’s being called “extensions”. So I also see your point on the extension part.
    Last CFC: November 2004 BC & 100% Natural Since: March 25, 2005 (8 yrs!)
    View "My Hair Journey" (Parts 1 - 3) at: https://www.facebook.com/tiana.townsell/photos_albums
    Ms. Nappturality 2008, Ms. Black Washington USA 2009 The journey is the reward

  6. #46
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    Because evidently this is her Friend and she must be a True Blue Friend to be so concerned and have mad love for her Friend, and she shouldn't be faulted for doing so. [/b]
    ITA. Sometimes all peple need to know that they are still beautiful.
    Ask her if you can try a hairstyle on her oneday or just see what her natural hair is looking like.
    It could be damaged it if its just being covered up or she says that puting a leave in is too much then ain't no telling what under those wigs girl.

    Talk to your friend and be a friend that's all you can do. Don't push anything on her but be theur to listen and give good advice to help her acclomplish HER HAIR Goals. Even if it is a press and curl. OR whatever tell her ceramic is better. You know.
    Follow your heart you know your friend not us.

    HTH

    Naturalybeautiful
    Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

    Confucius


  7. #47
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    I think the original post asked the question - does this annoy you? To answer your question, this does not offend me. I think people have to go through their own transitions and take their own journey. I simply celebrate the stage that person happens to be in at that time. My best friend had natural hair about 1 year after I went natural, and then about 3 years after I loc'd, she did as well - I move a little faster, and she takes her time, but it's all good. She wore braids for 3 years after she went natural, and loved it. Everyone has to make their own decision, and it frees my spirit to remain in "acceptance" mode.

    blessings,
    erin
    The Nappturous Diva
    Check out my nappturous video channel!
    www.youtube.com/nappturousdiva
    [SIZE=2][b][url="http://www.youtube.com/nappturousdiva"]Natural? Check out my NAPPTUROUS VIDEO Channel![/url]
    [url="http://www.myspace.com/executivemarketinggroup"]Nappturous Diva's MYspace[/url][/b][/SIZE]

  8. #48
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    I know....I know it's not my business...but it really annoys me.

    I have a friend who went natural about 1 month before I did my bc a year ago. She said all her reasons for going natural...she felt fake...it's not natural...trouble working out...black women are beautiful. You know all the reasons.

    Anyhow, I have seen her ONCE with a fro. ONCE. The rest of the time she is burning it straight, wearing weaves, wearing wigs, wearing clip ons. I personally think she looks foolish with that shiny fake barbie looking hair on her head. Since she first got it done a year ago I haven't seen it at all. I have no idea what her natural hair actually looks like.

    So I want to say "WHY ARE YOU NATURAL?" but I feel like it would be really out of place.

    I just find it really idiotic. Anyone else know a hidden natural in their lives.
    [/b]
    Yes, I have known people like this and I am not annoyed by it.

    I got into this discussion with someone the other day about religion and God. They made a statement that I felt to be very simple, yet powerful. She was talking about how easy it is to judge someone's actions without considering the fact that everyone is on their own personal, individual journey/path with God. For instance, just because you've reached a certain path in your journey where you have been enlightened enough to stop doing certain things (i.e., drinking, drugs, whatever), doesn't mean that another person has reached that path...yet. But it doesn't make them any less of a Christian, either.

    I felt those words were powerful and can see how they apply in many areas of my own life now. For instance, just because someone with natural hair isn't wearing their hair in particular styles that you would deem natural doesn't make them any less of a natural. I feel that people should respect where others are at in their personal hair care journey as they would want someone else to respect where they are in theirs.
    [color=#333399]
    [SIZE=2]
    [/color][/SIZE]

  9. #49
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    Everyone's given me so much to think about and thanks for that.
    arbonnegirl you give me hope that one day my friend can be proud of herself also. Also shortydowop, I get what you mean, some more food for thought.

    Thanks.
    [i]"Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend."[/i] - Bruce Lee

  10. #50
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    Yes, I have known people like this and I am not annoyed by it.

    I got into this discussion with someone the other day about religion and God. They made a statement that I felt to be very simple, yet powerful. She was talking about how easy it is to judge someone's actions without considering the fact that everyone is on their own personal, individual journey/path with God. For instance, just because you've reached a certain path in your journey where you have been enlightened enough to stop doing certain things (i.e., drinking, drugs, whatever), doesn't mean that another person has reached that path...yet. But it doesn't make them any less of a Christian, either.

    I felt those words were powerful and can see how they apply in many areas of my own life now. For instance, just because someone with natural hair isn't wearing their hair in particular styles that you would deem natural doesn't make them any less of a natural. I feel that people should respect where others are at in their personal hair care journey as they would want someone else to respect where they are in theirs.
    [/b]
    :clap:
    3 years natural
    Hair type - 4-a/3-c
    Current Length - Shoulder

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